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For those with a still working Brain Cell

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SUPERMARKET

Me: Why is there plastic on the payment keypad?   Cashier: to protect people from Covid.

Me: but isn’t everyone touching the plastic keypad the same way they would the regular keypad?

Cashier: Silence and a look of confusion.

Me: Why don’t you pack the grocery bags anymore?  

Cashier: Because of Covid 19 to reduce the spread of catching or spreading the virus. 

Me: But a shelf packer took it out of a box and put on the shelf, a few customers might of picked it up and put it back deciding they don’t want it, I put it in my cart then on the conveyer belt, You pick it up to scan it. But putting it in a bag after you scan is risky?

Cashier: Silence and a look of confusion.

ME AT DRIVE-THRU

Server: (holds a tray out the window with a bag of food for my friend to grab).

Me: why is my bag of food on a tray?   Server: so I don’t touch your food because of Covid.

Me: didn’t the cook touch my food? Didn’t the person wrapping my food touch it and then touch it again when placing it in my bag? Didn’t you touch the bag and put it on the tray? Didn’t you touch the tray? 

Cashier: Silence and a look of confusion.

ME IN SOCIETY

Societies; If you cough or sneeze do it in your elbow or sleeve, Also society: Don’t shake hands or hug anyone or you will spread the virus.  To greet people do an elbow tap instead. 

Me: Elbow tap? Isn’t that where you tell people to sneeze or cough? Into their elbow? Now you want people to tap each other with that elbow, wouldn’t it be safer to sneeze into the elbow and shake hands as we did before Covid.

ME AT RESTAURANT

Hostess: ok, I can seat you at this table right here (4 feet away), but I will need you to wear a mask to the table.

Me: what happens when I get to the table?   Hostess: you can take off the mask.

Me: then it is safe over there?  Hostess: yes.

Me: are those fans blowing above the table? Is that the air-conditioning I feel?

Server: Silence and a look of confusion.

You are not allowed to stand and drink at the pub.  You have to sit down. But at the shopping centre, you are not allowed to sit down, all the chairs are roped off. 

Now, do you realise the brainwashing these poor staff have been subjected to? To keep their fast-dwindling jobs and their means to feed themselves and their families, they have to follow orders that would make the village idiot laugh. You don’t have to follow orders so if not for God’s sake then your children’s sake; for the sake of sanity.

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MICHAEL WALSH is a journalist, broadcaster and the author of RISE OF THE SUN WHEELEUROPE ARISE TROTSKY’S WHITE NEGROESMEGACAUST,  DEATH OF A CITYWITNESS TO HISTORY, THE BUSINESS BOOSTERTHE FIFTH COLUMN VOLUME I and IIFOR THOSE WHO CANNOT SPEAKIMMORTAL BELOVEDTHE ALL LIES INVASIONINSPIRE A NATION Volume IINSPIRE A NATION Volume II , SLAUGHTER OF A DYNASTY , REICH AND WRONG,  THE RED BRIGANDSRANSACKING THE REICH ,    SCULPTURES OF THE THIRD RIECH: ARNO BREKER AND REICH SCULPTORS  SCULPTURES OF THE THIRD RIECH:  JOSEF THORAK AND REICH SCULPTORS ,   SCULPTURES OF THE THIRD REICH VOLUME III Porcelain and Reich Sculptors, The Exiled Duke Romanov Who Turned Desert Into Paradise , THE DOVETAILS , SEX FEST AT TIFFANY’S  and other book titles. These illustrated best-selling books are essential for the libraries of informed readers.

MICHAEL WALSH NOVELS

The revenge of a predator is a city-vigilante epic better than Death Wish A LEOPARD IN LIVERPOOL , 55 lavishly illustrated first-hand stories by a Liverpool sailor THE LEAVING OF LIVERPOOL, Latest Killer-Thriller From Michael Walsh the City Vigilante Supremo The Stigma Enigma , A powerful thought-provoking paranormal romance The Soul Meets, How to form a naughty ménage a trois THE DOVETAILS and SEX FEST AT TIFFANY’S.

Latest Michael Walsh bestsellers: Those who fall victim to the taxman, banks and moneylenders are victims of legalised mugging  DEBTOR’S REVENGE, The Business Booster shows you how to double your profits not your workload THE BUSINESS BOOSTER 

MICHAEL WALSH is a journalist, author, and broadcaster. His 70 books include best-selling RHODESIA’S DEATH EUROPE’S FUNERAL, AFRICA’S KILLING FIELDS,  THE LAST GLADIATORS, A Leopard in Liverpool, RISE OF THE SUN WHEELEUROPE ARISE, FOR THOSE WHO CANNOT SPEAK, THE ALL LIES INVASIONINSPIRE A NATION Volume IINSPIRE A NATION Volume II, and many other book titles. These illustrated best-selling books are essential for the libraries of informed readers.

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